When Love Hurts

We have all been betrayed by a loved one. I know I have, the process of healing from the heartbreak is in stages, that’s we tell each other. Most of you will probably say it is indeed a fact because you can relate.

I have to agree but I’m here today to unlock, uncover, outline these stages we all speak of loosely. Do they exist and should they?

Tell you what, the last time my heart was broken I don’t even really remember which stages I went through. Maybe it’s because I’d seen it coming, we do have a tendency of hoping what God is clearly showing us is not true and get shocked when we get let down. Story for another day. Anyway I once documented my heartache in the form of letters. I would send these to my sister everyday for 10 days. These will be my case point. Some days as you will notice I was just numb.

Heart Pains: Letters to the heart-breaker

Day 1

Hate Letter : Woman scorned

I decided not to share the original one because of language. This is definitely PG version. Everyone knows on the first day you have no kind words for the perpetrator

Dear…

Who do you think you are
Taking what’s not yours
Pretending you have no clue
That kind of selfishness that we don’t normally see
That kind that bleeds people dry

Who the do you think you are
Certainly not a clueless lost puppy
More like a vicious rabies infested dog
All that was ever good, were the excuses I made for you
And the excuses they made

No more Mr 
You have taken enough
I leave you in the hands of Karma
That one will deal with you
In ways I cannot even fathom

Good bye Mr 
I see who you are
A worthless pile of rubbish
So not worth my time

Deuces

Day 2
NUMB
Dear …

I can’t place this feeling
Am I resigned, sad, afraid
Why am I calm
Wondering

Maybe tomorrow I will feel
Or maybe I will sink into oblivion
Not missing you or wondering
Wouldn’t mind at all

My reality is dark that’s what it is
There could be light at the end of the tunnel
No one knows
Walk with me please that’s all I ask

I have come to a realisation
That this feeling, love, hard to suppress
Why you though, jury is still out
Stubborn fact: for as long as I feel it I know I will be here

I am here…

Day 6  
A LITTLE TOO LONG
Dear …

My deepest regrets
Your flowers have wilted
A painful death, irreversible
I wept, my tears dried
You stayed away, just a little too long

Your place in my heart, void
My feelings for you, ashes
Buried deep, to be unseen
I bled, I’m healing
You stayed away, just a little too long

It’s a little too late now
The waters run dry
You are lost
A ghost, dead
Only memories live on

I am not afraid to remember
You shouldn’t either
Vivid memories of moments, all so surreal
Those will fade
A beautiful dream shared

Wake up now.

Day 8  
KNACKERED
Hello …

I’m exhausted

Been running up Everest and down
The high and low
Losing my breathe
My heart’s weathering

I’m feeling dizzy
Been on the merry go round
More than a thousand circles
Losing my mind, my head is spinning

Lost in the silence between us
This cave, dark and eerie
Your laughter an echo, scary
I’m not afraid, just numb

My heart and head useless now
Addled, sapped can’t do anything now
I’m just waiting on you now
Release me!!!

Day 9  
LOST GIRL

She has a broken compass useless in the woods
Looking for hidden pirates treasure, precious
Deep into the woods she goes
Drawn by a strong force
Supernatural

She has no map
Her bearing all messed up
Promised treasure nowhere to be found
A wild goose chase it was
That sweet devil’s whisper, enchanting

Which way is home, the trees all look the same
There is a storm brewing
Lost in the woods, alone freezing
Needing a miracle
Light

Lost girl, wait for day
Dawn is near…

To be continued…

This weekend I would like us to chat about these stages. Can you relate?